Last week, Jeff and I attended Catalyst 2012 in Atlanta with 13,000 others. It was amazing, as I knew it would be. The music was phenomenal; the speaking was passionate and engaging. The energy was contagious. I was prepared for all of that. What I wasn't prepared for was the resonating in my spirit every day since we've been home, the words I keep hearing repeated in my head, beckoning me to be more, do more, believe more.
One phrase keeps repeating over and over, louder than the rest. It is this: "It is better to be marked by God than to be marketed by man" (Christine Caine)
Initially, I thought to myself "Well, sure that's better. Being marked by God: what could be better than that?" But then it hit me that I don't really live like that's the better choice. If I'm blatantly, painfully honest with myself (and you too), I will admit that this is sometimes a struggle for me. I confess that I like to be known, to be noticed, appreciated, recognized. My human nature cries out for it at times when I least expect it.
I've wrestled with this notion of of being known recently in my writing. I've asked myself "Who really cares what I have to say?" one minute then "What if no one wants to read this?" the next. But what I know is this: I am writing because God told me to write the story. If no one ever reads it other than me and Jeff, well, God STILL told me to do it, so there is still purpose within.
But will I be "ok" with that? Really?
What if no one ever knows that my passion is for getting clean water to everyone in Ethiopia? Does that diminish the importance of such a task? No, not at all. It simply diminishes my name, and that's where I want to be really. I want to be okay with no one ever knowing me, but instead knowing the God who calls me to act.
Anonymity is a lost art in today's world. We live in a society that screams for notoriety and fame. We live in a world that says if we aren't recognized, we aren't worthy. We live in a world that says if we are last, we are least. We live in a society that tells us in order to be someone, we must have more money, more fame, more house, more car, more clothes, more facebook friends, more blog followers, more tweets, more more more...
But God tells me that "The first will be last and the last will be first". (Matthew 20:16). His word says "What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world, yet loses his own soul?" (Matthew 16:26). It tells me "If you do not give up everything you have, you cannot be my disciple" (Luke 14:33)
My prayer is that I become more and more anonymous in my life, and that Jesus become more elevated, more known because of my life. Here's the truth that is ringing in my ears: My life is for His glory, not mine.So if man never knows the name of Holly Prosser, so be it. I have purpose to fulfill regardless. Oh, how I want to bring Him honor and fame. Change my heart, God. Mark me for your work. I'm ready. I'm willing.
I have been married to my best friend for 26 years. We have an 24 year old son and an 13 year old daughter. I am overwhelmed by how much God blesses me! My desire is to be more and more like my Creator every day.
10/30/07- orientation meeting with home study agency 11-12/07- gathering documents for home study 1/28/08- home vist #1 2/1/08- immigration application and finger printing 2/5/08- home visit #2 2/22/08- accepted by placement agency (Adoppt, Inc) 2/27/08- received completed home study 2/28/08- home study received at USCIS office in Louisville 3/20/08- received I-171 H form! 3/26/08- KY state seals received for all dossier documents 4/4/08- dossier sent to Consulate General of Vietnam in San Francisco for Vietnam Embassy authentication 4/8/08- dossier received in San Francisco 4/22/08- received confirmation from the Consulate General's office that our dossier was sent to Vietnam on 4/21! 4/28/08- dossier received in Vietnam; sent for translation 5/19/08- received word that our dossier was logged in sometime last week. WE ARE OFFICIALLY WAITING A REFERRAL NOW! 8/8/08- officially told we will NOT be getting Ellie from Vietnam 9/1/08- Deadline for referrals from Vietnam... none for us. 9/3/08- requested our dossier be sent back to us; researching other options for adoption; getting info on changing our home study and USCIS forms; LOTS of prayers on where God wants us to go next 9/8/08- Approved by Celebrate Children International to begin the process of adopting from Ethiopia! 9/15/08- Ethiopia contract and fees sent in. Our homestudy has been amended, and we are waiting for our amended 171H form as well. 9/30/08- received our amended 171H! 12/20/08- saw picture of a little girl; waiting for more info. 12/27/08- received video footage of little girl; waiting on medical info to make our decision. 12/30/08- received word that she is healthy 12/31/08- dossier returned to us with US Dept. and Ethiopian Embassy seals! 1/1/09- received complete medical evaluation on child; we will accept referral!! We have found her! 1/7/09- signed the papers to accept the referral of our Ellie. 4/9/09- re-fingerprinted for our 171H, as they are about to expire. STILL waiting on a court date... 6/5/09-Ellie has been moved to the Transition House in the city! Still no court date assigned 6/9/09- Court date assigned for 6/18/09!! 6/19/09- court date reassigned to 7/2/09 7/2/09- PASSED COURT!!! Awaiting travel dates! 7/29/09- Embassy date appointed for 8/11/09. Tickets purchased to travel on August 7th!!!!! WOO HOOO~~~ 8/7/09- left for Ethiopia! 8/9/09- met Ellie face to face for the first time! 8/15/09- HOME at last!!