When you can't give a gift...

To My Little Girl,

I don't know where you are in the world today. I don't even know if you are born yet. I don't know if your hair is curly or straight, or if your eyes are deep set or not. I don't know if you have dimples in your cheeks. I don't know if your fingers are long and straight or short and pudgy. There seems to be so much that I don't yet know about you. But I know that I love you already.

I have prayed for you for years. I realize that may sound crazy to you or to others, but it's true. I have prayed that you would be a part of our family, and then I have waited until God said it was time for this to become reality. And I continue to pray.

Today, I pray for you, my precious little girl. I pray that if you are already born, that you are safe and sound. I pray that you have plenty to eat and water that is safe to drink. I pray that you are cared for by people who know of the love of Jesus and that they show you His Grace daily. I pray that you are growing in a place where you know that you are special and that you are loved. I pray that there is peace around you.

I pray for your mother. I am so grateful for the sacrifice that she will make so that you can be in our home. I pray that she has strength and courage. I pray that someone around her loves her unconditionally and is showing her of the love of the Savior who makes all things new. I pray for courage to make the ultimate sacrifice so that her child can be cared for in a way that perhaps she is unable to do. And I pray that she rests easily. I pray that if she is carrying you right now, that she is healthy and always concerned about doing what is healthy for you, her unborn child. I pray that she knows how much of a debt I will forever owe her because she is giving to me what I could not do myself.

I pray for those who will care for you in an orphanage. Maybe you are already there, and they already know and love you. I pray for endurance and patience to care for you lovingly day in and day out. I pray that they sing to you, sweet lullabies at night and fun, silly songs during the day. I pray that they know how much of a difference they are making in your life and in our lives too because they care for you.

I don't know what it will be like when I first get to hold you. I dayream about it all the time, but I know that none of my dreams will compare to that actual moment. I don't know when that day will be, but I pray that it is soon. I trust God's timing to bring us together as a family at just the perfect time. Until then, you can rest assured that I am praying the Almighty's protection on you constantly. I am praying already for the day that you will ask Jesus into your heart. What a celebration that will be!

I love you already, little girl. I wait anxiously for you to be with us. You are already a part of us. Merry Christmas to you baby, wherever you are.

Love,
Your mommy-to-be